Saturday, February 15, 2014

Despitation

"See, the thing is, there's just so many problems. He doesn't know what he wants and he just keeps yanking me back and forth. He's moody, and he's grumpy and he's bitchy, and he tells me he has 'strong feelings' for me, but then when I start to feel the same he doesn't anymore. And he tells me that he's not my friend and that it's just sex, but when I start to treat it that way, he 'calls me out' because 'that's what he does with his friends,' and gets upset that I don't come to his house early enough to 'actually hang out.' He thinks he's so adult-like but can't handle things not always going exactly his way, and he thinks he's a great communicator but he's worse at explaining himself and how he feels than just about anyone I've ever met. He either doesn't know how he feels, or he can't admit it to himself, and I hate it. I am so sick of it all."

"Then... why do you keep coming back?"

"I... I guess it's because... in spite of all that, when I'm with him... I'm happy."

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